Day 34 - November 7th

Wake up and check out. No internet!!! I get a taxi to the train station, and listen to some real funny radio ads. Both were selling apartments, “In London, you have the Thames lifestyle. In Hangzhou, you have the West Lake lifestyle!” and “I’m always first to the football pitch because I live at the Cambridge Complex”. I leave my backpack at the left luggage place at the train station and then jump into a mini van to the long-distance bus station. The driver was actually mad!

I get on a bus for Wuzhen, another water town which my mother suggested I go to! It takes a good hour to get there and then I jump into a rickshaw and he takes me on a tour for Y30... it was pretty shit! Haha! He took me to the old crappy part of town and to a wine wholesaler as I said I wanted to buy some! Cost me Y30 for 2 bottles and they look pretty nice! Tasted it... not too nice! He then took me to some old woman's house and I gave her Y1 for her to talk to me about her house. Apparently it was about 500 years old and there was these wooden panels which were supposed to be important. He then took me to some other back streets which were pretty crappy, though I did see a lot of local workshops with old folk making stuff!

He then took me to the main touristy area where he said it’s not really worth going to see. I look around the outside and like it so decide to pay the Y100 to get in. It was like the old town, but renovated and more pretty! Walked around the ‘scenic spot’, but a lot of the shows were not on as it is off season! Looked at all the sites inside, was okay, but the things that stuck out were the opera in the main square and the puppet show!

On the bus ride home, I sit next to a Chongqing University graduate and we get chatting. He tells me that there is another place nearby which is also a river town, but it is much much better and is free. On my return to Hangzhou, the traffic is chock-a-block. I manage to get on a taxi back to the train station, but the next train was in an hour and 45mins. It seems that Hangzhou has always got it in for me for travelling! I decide to spend my time in a Internet cafe/massage parlour/brothel! Strange combo place next to the station! Funny as I see a guy and his g/f, where his g/f is saying "let's go" but he’s saying back to her "let me play a little longer"! This goes on for a while. I have a little titter!

I have an urge for KFC so I go, but I was running out of time so run out of the place to catch my train. I think I actually forgot the chicken wings, but i don’t really know what I ordered! I get the usual stares on the train and can smell Bai Jiu everywhere. I don’t know if it’s me or what? I’m getting a real disliking of it now! I spend the rest of the train journey brainstorming what I need to do when at Yiwu (my next destination where I meet my uncle for work). The sweets in my pocket melt.

I arrive at Yiwu earlier then intended and jump in a cab. I share it with some other woman; cabs here are soo retarded! I get to my hotel and tell the receptionist that my uncle has booked me in and such. They take me up to the room and no one is there. I tip the bellhop; I was staying at a nice hotel, what can I do? Meet my uncle and eat dinner, then go to the street market and buy some more socks!

Miles walked: 231.078m

Day 12 - October 16th

Bitten by mozzys last night on the eyebrow!!! Who bites the bloody eyebrow! This makes me angry all night and I try and find the culprit! I find lots of mozzy splats all over the walls in the room!

Wake up still ill! I think about how I want to spend the day. My original plan was to see all the attractions in Qufu and leave for Qingdao tonight. On second thoughts, I feel I need to rest and take it easy so I haggle my second nights stay at this hotel for Y50! I then get a rickshaw driver to take me to all the sights for Y20 for the day! He even took me to get breakfast and medicine for my cold!

First stop is the Confucius museum, where I get a free guided tour! The girl who gave me the tour got sooo annoyed as my Chinese was poor and I had to stop her every so often to ask her what she meant! She got really frustrated! It was hard work for both of us! Apparently she is a descendant of Confucius and was training to be a vet!

On the way to the next stop, I spy a music shop so I jump out the rickshaw and go in. I buy a harmonica, but they didn’t have any small travel size guitars! Just as I was beginning to like this place, the rickshaw driver takes me to this tackiest shittiest waxworks! They precede to rape me several places… entry, incense sticks and gay hand wash which they said was from blessed water. I should have known better, but I was caught unaware! Spend Y56 in there for stuff I really didn’t care about! I tell them I am disgusted with their behaviour and they seem to be a bit embarrassed and I tell the driver never to take me to a place like that again! He is also embarrassed! We then go past a youth hostel! The taxi driver from yesterday said there wasn’t any in town!!! I am pretty pissed off at that point!

I am then followed by a lady on a bike who insists that she gives me a tour of Konglin (the burial ground of Confucius and his descendants). She starts at Y20 but I tell her I am not interested, then she drops to Y10 and I tell her it’s not about the money, I’m just pissed off and tired from the last guided tour! She follows me all the way into the cemetery and starts chatting to me. I get into the grounds and she offers to lend me her bike for Y5 as the grounds are pretty big. I go for it! And I take her offer on the tour as courtesy! I have a great time on the bike riding around the cemetery! Other people take the motor cart thingies which cost Y10 and are just ushered around! Suckers! The lady says it should take me 20mins to ride around… I take my sweet time and end up going for 35mins!

I return to the starting point where she gives me a tour of the main Confucius’ tomb. I take this opportunity to ask her as many questions as possible and make her write things down for me… get my moneys worth! I get jipped again at his tomb where I pay my respects but pay for some flowers! She is confused why I am so stingy so I tell her about my intended three months travels and how everyone is ripping me off. She relates to me and then as she begins to understand my predicament, a lady comes up to me and starts telling my fortune. I try to run away, but I feel bad so I ask my tour lady if it’s okay to do this. She says go ahead. Now, I’m no expert in palm reading, but I know some of the stuff she was saying, I could have made up myself too! She says I am single minded and independent, not relying on my friends or family to get what I want (good guess for someone who is travelling on their own!) She said something about my 68^th birthday where I will get a gift from my son (haha) and I had to do something with that gift or I will have a premature death, otherwise, I will live for a long time (the split in my life line supposedly)! Also, I will not be rich this lifetime, but my kids will be rich from my work! Also there are two/three women in my life but I must only choose one of them. Thanks for the insightfulness! I didn’t know I was only allowed to marry one person at a time! She then asks for some money, even though at first she said she wasn’t in it for the money! I’m very reluctant, so give her Y3 (3 is a good number in Confucianism)! She is not happy! My guide tries to explain my money situation. We end up at Y6. I am not pleased and tell my guide. She now relates to me more! She then spills the beans and tells me a lot of the inside secrets and tells me never to tell anyone that she told me. I am paying far too much for things and need to be a bit more stubborn and have a goal when I arrive in towns for the first time. She turns out to be really nice and she says that she has a son of her own who is eleven. I think I play the poor ignorant son card very well!

I have a pot noodle special for lunch. The special bit is the sausages I get for it!

I visit the Confucius Temple and the Confucius Mansions. This is when I realise that if I waited, then all the Chinese tours would just go away! I started to flake out a bit so chilled out in the Gardens of the Confucius Mansions. It smelt of farm! Languages started to blur for me now as I started to hear Cantonese everywhere and talking in Chinese for so long has started to really get to me! I swear the Tannoys in shops were speaking in Cantonese, but that would make no sense at all in the north of China!

Have dinner at the same restaurant/tent I ate at last night. I tell them that I am a little ill so they tell me I should have some fish soup and they give me ginger water (no, not orange water!). Bernice (old class mate from Beijing) was actually saying the other day that chewing on ginger helps the immune system! The food seemed cheaper today… I think I must have befriended them! I have liver for dinner… it was actually really nice! I leave and the couple who own the restaurant/tent tell me to get more rest and take medicine!

I watch my favourite TV add so far. It shows a factory worker and tells of the bad conditions people are working in. Then it compares the conditions as like that of a fish swimming in dirty water! It then cuts to a picture of somebody’s lungs all black and minging from inhaling dirt and dust. Cut to fish dying and floating up to the top of the fish bowl (my fav. bit!). It then has people dressed in industrial protective gear and they all have smiling faces! The fish is now happy… I swear it must be smiling too! The ad was brought to you by Shandong Provincial Government!

Watch the replay of the England match and sleep.

Miles walked: 84.886m
Steps taken: 15,996 steps

Day 8 - October 12th

Worse wake-up ever!!! People slamming doors and cacking outside. The horrid cacking, clearing throat sound that the Chinese all seem to do! I go and have breakfast… disgusting slurp and preserved shit! I eat a few of the plain buns and an egg. That reminded me of my cat Chairman Mao who likes to eat eggs. Strange! I then go to find some place to wash my clothes. Turns out it was going to cost Y100 because they measure it in the pieces of clothing rather than weight and I had a lot of underwear! I walk away… it’s going to be a bad day.

On the way back to my room I bump into an American guy called Owen. I ask him if he knew of anywhere to get clothes washed. He seems in a happy mood as he has just got his done at the same place and thought it a bargain! I decide to get my clothes washed for Y100. To top it off, it was drizzling outside which continued all day!

On my way out, I bump into Owen again and we spend the rest of the day together seeing the sights in Kaifeng. We see a lot that day as we hop from destination to destination via rickshaws. We visit the Temple of the Chief Minister, Shaanshangan Guildhall, Longting Park (old palace) and Tieta Park to see the Iron Pagoda. The pagoda is claimed to be the best (number one) in China! It is pretty cool and we climb to the top to find a group of men stinking of booze and giggling! Why didn’t I think of that? There is also this strange system in Kaifeng where if you tell the people of the ticket offices that the rickshaw people took you there, they get Y2 for food money! Pretty cool system I think! Everyone’s a winner!

Owen turns out to be a pretty sound guy and was working/studying in Hong Kong for the last year and really got into the local music scene there, something which I didn’t manage to do! I guess the Americans who usually leave the country are always the sounder ones!

We then decide to go to the Sacred Heart of Jesus Church. Looks like a Catholic style church.. Seeming that we had done two of the worlds major religions we decide why stop now? We walk half a block to see a well which is what remains of the old synagogue (Kaifeng used to have a large Jewish population). It is situated in the boiler room of the number four People’s Hospital. Walking through the hospital was one of the most messed up things I’ve done in a while! We walk past a room where it seems a patient (Owen informed me later that it was a lady) who just looked grim and had a sort of stand and cloth looped around her jaw, keeping her head up. I really don’t know what the hell it was but I walked away as fast as possible! Messed up! Owen decides to go back for a second look! We walk into the boiler and find a well… not much to it!

We then walk to Dongda Mosque via the Muslim quarter. Not as nice as the mosque I saw in Xi'an but had the same hallmarks… looks just like a Chinese temple! So four major religions in a day! Can’t do that in many cities, I tell you!

We then walk past a shop which has a load of kegs in the window. We stop in to have a few bevys! German beer… expensive, but you have to treat yourself sometimes! I also find the nicest smelling portaloo I have ever had the pleasure to use!

Have dinner in the night market. We sit down and order our food and then a lady with a guitar and a mic sits down on the table next to ours. We decide to invite her over and Owen asks her to play a few songs that he has on his iPod. No luck… too contemporary! So we ask her to play her favourite song and then I also play a song. I rock! I then ask her to play ‘The Moon Represents My Heart’ a classic Chinese song which I really like. No one else in the street agrees with me… too cliché maybe!

Owen suggests that I should record and play some Chinese folk songs and package it in a way for western audiences. I tell him my time came and went long ago…

Miles walked: 54.355m
Steps taken: 38,310